Friday, June 8, 2012

Interlude: Adjusting the Rear Suspension of a KLR 650 (and a Brush with Death)

I have been way too preoccupied this past week to get Kingy lubed and adjusted as I have been spending the lion's share of my mental energy contemplating a future in which our robot companions will be better and more fulfilling friends than actual people.  They will have all of the best qualities of human-friends with none of the negatives, and you'll be able to kick them around like puppy dogs.

However, today I adjusted the suspension because I was going to teach someone how to ride on the top floor of my office's parking garage, but even with the suspension set on 1, both of La Enana's feet could not touch the ground at the same time (even on tip toes), so we scrapped the idea.

Adjusting the Suspension of  a KLR 650
To adjust the suspension of a KLR 650, open your preferred web browser and click here.  This is all you need.  Well, a little charisma would have been nice, but let's just say this is all the factual information you need.

Close Call
Last week, I very nearly came to my tragic end.  I was cruising down Santa Monica Blvd, (sober, most likely moderately breaking the speed limit) when I noted that traffic was backed up on the other side of the road.  Out of nowhere, a big-ass utility van pulled right in front of me making a ridiculous left hand turn with zero visibility due to the blocked traffic.  Or perhaps he was an assassin hired by my estranged wife.

I attempted the emergency stop that I learned from the god of the machine, Jimmy Lewis.  Actually, this is not true.  I panicked like a pre-adolescent upon seeing Justin Bieber, and must have stomped on the rear break because my rear end fish tailed badly.  I let off the rear break, tugged on the front break, but by that time, I was already on top of the son of a bitch, who decided that, upon seeing a motorcyclist hurtling towards him at a high rate of speed, the best course of action was inaction.  I was still going too fast to stop when I was just a few feet away, so I let off the break and leaned as far over as I could to the left.  I was not swerving as much as I was trying to get my body out of the way of the van when I made impact.  By some miracle, I did not hit him, but the image that is still burned into my brain is while I was leaning as far over as I could, and while the world was traveling in slow motion, a woman in stopped traffic on the other side of the street opened and covered her mouth in sheer terror as she watched my brush with death.

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